#188 of 365~The Journey of Identity

Every time I sit down to write a post, I always wonder about the audience reading it and why they choose to read our blog.  After seeing the overwhelming support come through comments and private messages about our recent posts, I have come to the realization that people value honesty.  Honesty about ones feelings, faith, and life.  That is why Nick and I created our "Waiting for Baby Stories" blog: http://waitingforbabystoriesblog.blogspot.com  We wanted people to hear our story, know they were not alone in their journey, and feel a sense of freedom talking about their own story-without ridicule or judgement.

Which is why I'm going to be honest.  We have yet to post that we are pregnant on the Waiting for Baby Stories blog or Facebook page.  As someone whose identity and has been identified as-Infertile-it is hard to know this new identity as-fertile, as pregnant.  It is still hard for me to get those words out, "I'm pregnant."  I can't contain the tears and hopefulness of those words.  It is hard for me to say those words to the women that have come into my life after our bond has been identified by the heartbreak of infertility, miscarriage, or waiting for adoption. To look them in the eye and not feel the betrayal, has been hard.

Yet, it is time for me to find a new identity for what we believe of ourselves is how we portray the world.  If you are fatherless, you will never expect to find or understand the love of a father.  If your poor, you will always think with a poverty mindset never fully experiencing the depths of your wealth.  If your infertile, you will never believe you could be a mother or father and hold the children who are in your life at a distance.  This is where we must change our mindsets to become the parents that we were always meant to be. Which we are very excited to be.